Buy a God Damned Book Why Don't You

It was dreadfully dead in the store. The floors felt no feet, the books remained unbrowsed, and the poor girl at the register nearly died from the lack of stimulation. Sure there were a few mindless tasks for her to do, but she could feel each brain cell die of boredom. She heard each cell scream it's last breath before it's microscopic life was snuffed out. She was sure she saw the hand on the clock go backwards not just once and that time was actually slowing to a halt. Perhaps a crossword or sudoku from the free paper in front of her would keep her alive. There were no guarantees. So if in a few hours you find a corpse in a Janis Joplin shirt strewn behind the counter by the front door, you'll know she didn't make it. What a pity.