There once lived a girl who wished she could fly so she made a balloon out of paper. She tied one end of a string to her wrist and the other to the paper balloon.
She tried her best to make it float, 'there's air in there', she thought. But still the balloon lay on the grass at the end of the string that was tied to her wrist.
She ran and she ran waving the paper balloon behind her like a kite. And still, when she stopped, it fell to the ground and lay on the grass.
The girl took a penny that she found on the ground and dropped it down the wishing well. As the penny fell into the well she closed her eyes tight and made a wish for her paper balloon to take flight.
She opened her eyes and her feet lifted from the grass and she knew her wish had come true. With her hand held high above her head below the paper balloon by the string, she watched the well get smaller.
Through the clouds and with the birds, the girl was finally flying. She soared over mountains and rivers and plains. She travelled across oceans and saw the whole world.
When she finally landed, safe back at home, the girl began to dream of her next great adventure.
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I like this, but the ending seems to come a little abruptly. It seems like you go from giving intricate details (i.e., tying the string around her wrist, dropping the penny down the well, etc.) to not giving us enough information. This is complete as is, in the sense that there is a beginning, middle and end, but when she finally achieves liftoff with the balloon, that should be when our sense of wonder takes off with her. We should (in my opinion, anyway) follow her and her paper balloon, especially if she travels the world on it, and we should see some of the sights she enjoys along with her. All in all, I enjoy this, but it feels more like the blurb on the back of the book than the story itself.
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